Reality Checks-they need not be painful

Who enjoys a reality check? Doubt they are pleasant to many of us. Very recently my daughter has moved to Australia and I am faced with certain realities. So do you struggle to face reality: The Real World?

When I give Talks I always include the statement

‘Our beliefs are our reality’

Some of us can and do face reality.  Others prefer not to face reality. Realists or non-realists.  No-one has the right to say that one way is right and the other way is wrong. We have choice. We can do whatever the Hell we like.

I feel a need to share. Please read on if you have a moment.

A little family story.

My lovely daughter has gone to Australia, at least until July. But I won’t bury my head in the sand. She may be there for a while. Within a month she has landed a full-time job; the kind of position she hoped to secure in the UK/ London area. When frustrated by her prospects in UK she decided to do a year in Oz. There is an Australian boyfriend in the mix too.

(Can’t say I blame her. Her brother spent two years in Oz in 2009. Met his lovely Louise. We visited him and loved it).

My main points.

Her father and I went out to the Middle East in the ‘80s. I really enjoyed myself. I taught there. My husband’s career benefited. When we flew off in the plane I don’t think I gave my family left behind too much thought. We were very excited and looking forward to it all.

So my reality check and belief: What goes around comes around. I won’t lament about the gut wrenching thought that her future lies over there. If I were in her shoes I would jump at the chance to copy her. I have said to friends and am sharing it now: I questioned myself just a little

• I was going to miss my daughter enormously –  But
•  Was I secretly a little jealous because in my opinion it is so exciting to do something like that.

Also we cannot and should not control the actions of others

•  I could bleat and moan and urge her to come back (not something I would remotely condone by anyone)
• I could hang on to the hope that she may come back and be closer to me
• How could I possibly think like that when I actually want to live in France at some point?
• I can get the brochures out and decide where Herb and I can go for our honeymoon on the way back from a visit to Australia

My reality check for you to consider:

1. We have your own inbuilt, up close and personal belief system playing in our head.
2. If we don’t like our reality- our world- we can choose to change bits of it.
3. EFT and Matrix Reimprinting can help us find our zest for life . Our joie de vie!

Change is required though and this can stop many people in their tracks. Most of us do not want to change. It’s that simple. Or we may be secretly fearful because we think so much has to change around us for our world to improve. My book  Survive and Thrive after Trauma has 2 key words Choose and choice.

I will finish here because I offer a little extra story.

In the early 1920’s my father aged six was taken to Australia. His father was a mining engineer, very highly thought of in Canberra. The country was growing, booming. He was in the right place, right time. But family life was different in those days. Family tragedy had struck: Scarlet Fever meant my grandfather never saw his youngest daughter who died age four.

My grandmother decided to join her husband after the death of two of their children from Scarlet Fever. So she and my father braved the high seas!  My childhood house in Scotland was called Brindabella. Named after the Brindabella Mountains near Canberra. My wonderful great aunties gave my grandmother such emotional angst over this desertion, wrote such emotional letters that the family came back after 3 years. Obviously we are a family who roam.  If we are confident to spread our wings in any direction then we have been blessed with a freedom to do so.

By the way if you have family abroad I use two mobile Apps which allow me to speak and communicate with my daughter easily. Free –  Viber: (internet connection necessary). We speak regularly. WhatsApp is the other: we share texts and photos.

Thank you if you reached the end of this blog!