Negative beliefs and where they might come from.

Do you have times in your life when you believe there is a perfectly good reason why you can’t or won’t do something?  But, you recognise that your reason is potentially limiting how you live your life.

Some of us carry negative, limiting beliefs around, and have done so for quite a number of years.

So where did they come  from; these limitations that can dictate many aspects of our lives?  Did they magically appear to screw us up, was it someone else’s  fault? We can have some negative beliefs from our time being in the womb. I used to get cross with that kind of statement. Saying ‘Oh for God’s sake give us (mothers) a break.   I don’t say that now.  And if interested have a quick read http://www.askdrsears.com/topics/pregnancy-childbirth/fourth-month/7-ways-bond-your-preborn-baby .

Think the pregnant woman, being abused by an aggressive and drunken partner.  The foetus feels the stress and fear.

Think Phobia.  My favourite phobia analogy  is the child playing ‘hide and seek.’   The child has hidden too well, has not been found for ages, or has possibly become stuck or trapped.   A feeling of being trapped is a powerful belief  to be held in the subconscious.  It can manifest itself by

• feeling trapped and fearful to go on an aeroplane journey.  Very limiting for you and those with whom you share your life.
• the trigger of the ‘ trapped feeling’ when feeling stressed in a relationship, or in a business scenario.

However, the subconscious  is only trying to keep us safe.  It reminds us of a past memory of a frightening situation, one which we don’t wish to repeat,  do we?!   No, no no!   And that  negative reminder is constantly being given more power, over the years.   (see my photo,  the pond has protectors keeping the fish safe, but is that a realistic belief ?  No it’s just a nice little fun idea).  A belief is just that – a belief,   ours, no one else’s.  But on occasion some beliefs do not work for our greater good.

School teachers take a lot of blame for our negative beliefs.  It’s always good to have someone to blame.  Shudder the thought that we alone are responsible for the beliefs we have taken on.  (I am a primary teacher by profession)  Sometimes our psyche  has chosen to remember some comment which hurt or humiliated, and my goodness that can destroy potential.  I tell 2 cracking stories relating to  teachers  who pissed me off, big time.  One when I was 8 and the other 14. (notice I have been unable to stop myself from using  a particular word.)

And of course our mothers and fathers play a huge part in our belief system.  I like to believe that most mothers and fathers do the best job they can bringing up their children.  But emotional scars can certainly be traced back to our early years.

Later this month I am running a workshop on

• confidence and wanting to take the next step, whatever it is
• confidence to say ‘No’ to yet another responsibility
• confidence to find your purpose,  fulfilment , satisfaction
• clearing an  ‘empty nest ‘ feeling-  believe and know it’s your time now
• a realisation that there is more to life than ‘another Girl’s lunch’ (however much fun they usually are)

Negative beliefs limit our confidence,  limit our success,  limit our happiness and can be very bad for our physical health.

If you wish to shine with confidence and enjoy life to its fullest, please do not allow ‘old stuff’  to get in the way.

Give me a call if you want to find out how I may be able to help you.