That awkward question

‘That moment when the sick feeling hits your stomach and maybe some big decisions need to be made? How do you react to that moment? Do you shelve it, procrastinate wildly, tap, ( I just have) or deal with?’

I posted that awkward question on Facebook a few days ago and got no response. Often my posts have good interaction.

My therapy work involves helping people to move on from heavy end emotional stress issues and may some assumed it was a heavy end stress related question.

Frequently folks shirk wildly from those emotionally charged issues; hence the wild fluctuation I have with clients.

Why did no-one comment?

I could assume that readers

• were having a good day
• they want to ignore the elephant in their room
• it’s too painful
• their life is flowing smoothly
• they don’t want to openly comment, certainly not to be first

Why might I assume that

• because I frequently write about emotional issues which require healing or just some simple sorting out.

All these are assumptions and assuming is the recipe for a lot of tricky situations, sudden surprises. With hindsight I have come to realise that assuming, more often than not, is a foolish thing to do. It’s actually quite arrogant too if you think about it but hey- that’s my belief.

How come you or I think we know or assume what others mean when they are quiet, angry,  day dreamming, laughing?

Key piece of information:

Recommendation: Don’t assume.

I try my hardest not to assume. In my book Survive and Thrive after Trauma I write about the danger of assuming. It cost me some emotional pain. 

Some questions

So to take this into my realm of Emotional Healing please consider your response to my opening question.

Would your response change at different times of the day?

What subject leapt into your head when you read the question?

• A working relationship?
• A personal relationship?
• A life changing issue??
• A need to achieve more?
• The desire to appreciate the joys in your life?

And does that issue

1. disturb the equilibrium of your day?
2. affect your sleeping pattern?
3. make you want to sort it now?
4. cause procrastination to succeed so that you ignore it till the next time it annoys you?

Key Points to sum up

1. It is a truly wonderful feeling when you deal with the irritant or elephant. It allows space to enter your life for better and good.
2. Ignoring causes emotional blocks to strengthen and release from the blocks is more difficult; life certainly is less pleasurable.
3. And do you know what? You do deserve better.
4. And you can find out what stops you deserving better!

Some tweaking or deep transformational work around beliefs and patterns of self-limiting behaviour will get you there. It’s up to you. Sometimes it’s simple; sometimes some work needs done.

Enjoy your day!

If you want to address procrastination

Sneak a peek at my Home Study programme ‘Stop procrastination, Start doing‘. Specialist areas: Divorce and Relationship issues, Fertility and Mother/Child relationships, Emotional Trauma. Susan is the author of Survive and Thrive after Trauma.

Email: susan@hampshire-eft.co.uk